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cgtalk2005
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Who is Carlito?
Carlito is one of the few remaining and extremely rare South American Horned Slugs. Although quite curious and passive in nature, South American Horned Slugs are astonishingly stupid and have therefore dwindled down in population faster than panties being hurled at a Tom Jones concert. It is presently estimated, or perhaps optimistically misjudged, that only a mere hundred thousand exist in the deepest, dampest and drabbest of Chilean jungles. Being descendents of the Giant South African Slug species (and still a mind-boggling mystery how they crossed the continents), they tend to secrete a thick, slimy and glistening green mucus. Once termed "The species most likely to win first place in the Darwin Awards" by none other than Darwin himself late one night during a Poker game gone sour, their mucus tends to be particularly sweet scented therefore posing a precarious threat to their impending extinction. You see, South American Horned Slugs tend to have a staggeringly short memory span and will quite often (99.8% incidence rate) supplement their diet by ingesting their very own, already forgotten, mucus trails. This, in turn, leads to a never-ending feeding frenzy in which they spend the rest of their unquestionably meaningless days going around in circles and consuming their slimy discharge until either catastrophic intestinal eruption occurs, terminal exhaustion sets in, or they are fatefully preyed upon by the ever-ferocious and often-elusive South American Horned Beetle (who coincidentally evolved with the unfathomable gift of specifically identifying that very same mucus scent from over 3 kilometers away).
Carlito is one of the few remaining and extremely rare South American Horned Slugs. Although quite curious and passive in nature, South American Horned Slugs are astonishingly stupid and have therefore dwindled down in population faster than panties being hurled at a Tom Jones concert. It is presently estimated, or perhaps optimistically misjudged, that only a mere hundred thousand exist in the deepest, dampest and drabbest of Chilean jungles. Being descendents of the Giant South African Slug species (and still a mind-boggling mystery how they crossed the continents), they tend to secrete a thick, slimy and glistening green mucus. Once termed "The species most likely to win first place in the Darwin Awards" by none other than Darwin himself late one night during a Poker game gone sour, their mucus tends to be particularly sweet scented therefore posing a precarious threat to their impending extinction. You see, South American Horned Slugs tend to have a staggeringly short memory span and will quite often (99.8% incidence rate) supplement their diet by ingesting their very own, already forgotten, mucus trails. This, in turn, leads to a never-ending feeding frenzy in which they spend the rest of their unquestionably meaningless days going around in circles and consuming their slimy discharge until either catastrophic intestinal eruption occurs, terminal exhaustion sets in, or they are fatefully preyed upon by the ever-ferocious and often-elusive South American Horned Beetle (who coincidentally evolved with the unfathomable gift of specifically identifying that very same mucus scent from over 3 kilometers away).
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